Cat Quotes

Cats are the topic of discussion, even amongst famous people! Find famous funny Cat Quotes here. Cats have been with us since forever and there are some real famous cats from history, movies and literature. Browse our selection cute Cat Quotes and see what other people (or characters) have to say about these special creatures. The following is a collection of humorous, witty and often thought-provoking Cat Quotes.

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  • "He [the cat] liked to peep into the refrigerator and risk having his head shut in by the closing door. He also climbed to the top of the stove, discontinuing the practice after he singed his tail." - Lloyd Alexander

  • As anyone who has ever been around a cat for any length of time well knows cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human kind. - Cleveland Amory

  • "Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this." - Anonymous


Cat Quotes picture
  • Cats' hearing apparatus is built to allow the human voice to easily go in one ear and out the other. - Stephen Baker

  • "Cats are notoriously sore losers. Coming in second best, especially to someone as poorly coordinated as a human being, grates their sensibility." - Stephen Baker

  • Kittens are born with their eyes shut. They open them in about six days, take a look around, then close them again for the better part of their lives. - Stephen Baker

  • "If I die before my cat, I want a little of my ashes put in his food so I can live inside him." - Drew Barrymore

  • There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. - Wesley Bates

  • As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat. - Ellen Perry Berkeley

  • "When you are looking, a cat acts like a princess, but the minute they think you are not looking, a cat acts like a fool." - KC Buffington

  • Prowling his own quiet backyard or asleep by the fire, he is still only a whisker away from the wilds. - Jean Burden

  • If we treated everyone we meet with the same affection we bestow upon our favorite cat, they, too, would purr. - Martin Buxbaum


Funny Cat Quotes
  • "Most cats, when they are out want to be in, and visa versa, and often simultaneously." - Louis J. Camuti

  • Cats can be cooperative when something feels good, which, to a cat, is the way everything is supposed to feel as much of the time as possible. - Roger Caras

  • Cats always know whether people like or dislike them. They do not always care enough to do anything about it. - Winifred Carriere

  • If a cat did not put a firm paw down now and then, how could his human remain possessed. - Winifred Carriere

  • There is no more intrepid explorer than a kitten. - Jules Champfleury

  • Two things are aesthetically perfect in the world - the clock and the cat. - Emile Auguste Chartier

  • "You can't help that. We're all mad here." - Cheshire Cat quote by The Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland

    Cheshire Cat Quotes
  • "I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; In fact, I didn't know that cats COULD grin." - Cheshire Cat quote by Alice in Wonderland

  • "'It's a friend of mine - a Cheshire Cat', said Alice: 'Allow me to introduce it.' 'I don't like the look of it at all, said the King: 'however, it may kiss my hand if it likes.' 'I'd rather not.' the Cat remarked." - Cheshire Cat quote by Alice in Wonderland

  • I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Winston Churchill

  • Even the stupidest cat seems to know more than any dog. - Eleanor Clark

  • There are no ordinary cats. - Colette

  • "Cats are designated friends." - Norman Corwin

  • I'm aloof, I like to run around outside, but I also like to curl up in warm spots. I eat fish. - Megan Coughlin on why she'd make a good cat

  • We need a word for all the kitty-prints that are all over my windshield because the cats like to lie on my hood when the car is still warm. - Megan Coughlin

  • "Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want." - Joseph Wood Crutch

  • If a cat does something, we call it instinct; if we do the same thing, for the same reason, we call it intelligence. - Will Cuppy


Cat Quotes - funny, witty and true cat quotes by famous people
  • The smallest feline is a masterpiece. - Leonardo da Vinci

  • Way down deep, we're all motivated by the same urges. Cats have the courage to live by them. - Jim Davis

  • "You own a dog but you feed a cat."- Jenny de Vries

  • "Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well." - Missy Dizick

  • Actually, cats do this to protect you from gnomes who come and steal your breath while you sleep. - John Dobbin

  • "We have a theory that cats are planning to take over the world, just try to look them straight in the eye...yup, they're hiding something!" - Dog Fancy

  • No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat, and no amount of masking tape can ever totally remove his fur from your couch. - Leo Dworken


  • The naming of cats is a difficult matter. It isn't just one of your holiday games. You may think at first I'm mad as a hatter. When I tell you a cat must have three different names... - T.S. Eliot

  • You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat. - Albert Einstein, when asked to describe radio


Cat Quotes - ordered by surname
  • "It always gives me a shiver when I see a cat seeing what I can't see." - Eleanor Farjeon

  • "The smart cat doesn't let on that he is." - H.G. Frommer


More good cat quotes
  • "There is the little matter of disposal of droppings in which the cat is far ahead of its rivals. The dog is somehow thrilled by what he or any of his friends have produced, hates to leave it, adores smelling it, and sometimes eats it...The cat covers it up if he can..." - Paul Gallico

  • Don't think that I'm silly for liking it, I just happen to like the simple little things, and I love cats! - Michelle Gardner

  • "Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes!" - Theophile Gautier

  • Her function is to sit and be admired. - Georgina Strickland Gates

  • Cats know how to obtain food without labor, shelter without confinement, and love without penalties. - W. L. George

  • Cats are the ultimate narcissists. You can tell this by all the time they spend on personal grooming. Dogs aren't like this. A dog's idea of personal grooming is to roll in a dead fish. - James Gorman

  • "Prose book are the show dogs I breed and sell to support my cat." - Robert Graves

  • "After scolding one's cat one looks into its face and is seized by the ugly suspicion that it understood every word. And has filed it for reference."- Charlotte Gray

  • "Cats are kindly masters, just so long as you remember your place."- Paul Gray

  • "One must love a cat on its own terms."- Paul Gray

  • There is, incidently, no way of talking about cats that enables one to come off as a sane person. - Dan Greenberg

  • Fans think they want to see more than the 10 to 20 seconds of Itchy and Scratchy that we put on the show, but my feeling is less is more. Once you've skinned and flayed a cat, ripped his head off, made him drink acid and tied his tongue to the moon, there really isn't that much to say. - Matt Groening, 1993

  • "The really great thing about cats is their endless variety. One can pick a cat to fit almost any kind of decor, color, scheme, income, personality, mood. But under the fur, whatever color it may be, there still lies, essentially unchanged, one of the world's free souls." - Eric Gurney


Cute cat quotes
  • "Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." Robert Heinlein

  • How we behave toward cats here below determines our status in heaven. - Robert A. Heinlein

  • A cat has absolute emotional honesty: human beings, for one reason or another, may hide their feelings, but a cat does not. - Ernest Hemingway

  • By and large, people who enjoy teaching animals to roll over will find themselves happier with a dog. - Barbara Holland


  • Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose. - Garrison Keillor

  • Meow is like aloha - it can mean anything. - Hank Ketchum


  • Of all animals, the cat alone attains to the comtemplative life. He regards the wheel of existence from without, like the Buddha. - Andrew Lang

  • "The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it." - Doug Larson

  • "His mind is like a steel trap--full of mice." - Foghorn Leghorn

  • "I found out why cats drink out of the toilet. My mother told me it's because the water is cold in there. And I'm like: How did my mother know that?" - Wendy Liebman

  • "No matter how much cats fight, there always seems to be plenty of kittens." - Abraham Lincoln


Database of Cute cat quotes
  • Cats do not have to be shown how to have a good time, for they are unfailing ingenious in that respect. - James Mason

  • The sun rose slowly, like a fiery furball coughed up uneasily onto a sky-blue carpet by a giant unseen cat. - Michael McGarel

  • A meow massages the heart. - Stuart McMillan

  • One of the oldest human needs is having someone to wonder where you are when you don't come home at night. - Margaret Mead

  • "The cat has too much spirit to have no heart" - Ernest Menaul

  • "With their qualities of cleanliness, discretion, affection, patience, dignity, and courage, how many of us, I ask you, would be capable of becoming cats?" - Fernand Mery Her Majesty the Cat

  • "A dog will flatter you but you have to flatter the cat."- George Mikes

  • "You can keep a dog; but it is the cat who keeps people, because cats find humans useful domestic animals."- George Mikes

  • When I play with my cat, how do I know that she is not passing time with me rather than I with her? - Montaigne


  • "Winners are different. They're a different breed of cat." - Byron Nelson

  • Cats do care. For example they know instinctively what time we have to be at work in the morning and they wake us up twenty minutes before the alarm goes off." - Michael Nelson


  • The mathematical probability of a common cat doing exactly as it pleases is the one scientific absolute in the world. - Lynn M. Osband


  • "The problem with cats is that they get the same exact look whether they see a moth or an axe murderer." - Paula Poundstone


  • "People who hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life." - Faith Resnick


  • "You may own a cat, but cannot govern one." - Kate Sanborn

  • There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats. - Albert Schweitzer

  • "Everything I know I learned from my cat: When you're hungry, eat. When you're tired, nap in a sunbeam. When you go to the vet's, pee on your owner. - Gary Smith

  • You can't own a cat. The best you can do is be partners. - Sir Harry Swanson


  • "I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior." - Hippolyte Taine

  • "One is never sure, watching two cats washing each other, whether it's affection, the taste or a trial run for the jugular."- Helen Thomson

  • "A cat sees no good reason why it should obey another animal, even if it does stand on two legs."- Sarah Thompson

  • "Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat." - Mark Twain

  • If animals could speak the dog would be a a blundering outspoken fellow, but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

  • "If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve man, but it would deteriorate the cat." - Mark Twain

  • "One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives." - Mark Twain


  • "There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." - Unknown

  • "There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats." - Unknown

  • Civilization is defined by the pesence of cats." - Unknown


  • I believe cats to be spirits come to earth. A cat, I am sure, could walk on a cloud without coming through. - Jules Verne


  • Intelligence in the cat is underrated. - Louis Wain

  • "If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer." - Alfred North Whitehead

  • Like a graceful vase, a cat, even when motionless, seems to flow. - George F. Will

  • "The phrase 'domestic cat' is an oxymoron." - George Will

  • The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact. - P. G. Wodehouse

  • You can visualize a hundred cats. Beyond that, you can't. Two hundred, five hundred, it all looks the same. - Jack Wright (of Kingston, Ontario, the Guinness Book record holder for the owner of the most cats at one time [689])